


Prison B***h!

by Lady_Blade_WarAngel



Series: Crack Fic Madness One-Shots! [4]
Category: Naruto, Naruto Shippuuden - Fandom
Genre: A LOT of Innuendoes, Alternate Universe - Crack, Complete crack, Explicit Language, Gen, Karaoke, Parody, Song Parody
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-12
Updated: 2015-07-12
Packaged: 2018-04-09 00:04:56
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,322
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4326006
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lady_Blade_WarAngel/pseuds/Lady_Blade_WarAngel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sakura invites everyone round for Karaoke Night at her house, and Sasuke is unnerved when Sai and Naruto sing a certain song as a duet.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Prison B***h!

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, the title of this little ficlet is actually a real song. A friend of mine sang a cover version of it, and sent me a cd of it. So I ended up laughing my head off. And it inspired this. 
> 
> So just to be completely crazy, I found a Naruto Vid on Youtube with this song. However... It's a little crazy. So here it is - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oJWNTSbDs0s
> 
> I hope this makes you laugh. If not.... well I can't really complain. LOL!

Prison Bitch!

xXxXxXxXxXxXx

Naruto, Sasuke, Sai, Shikamaru, Neji, Chouji, Kiba, Shino, Gaara, Kankuro, Kakashi and Yamato were headed towards Sakura’s house. All of them looked miserable. Why might you ask? Sakura had decided that all the old rookies and team Gai, and Team Sand, and just about everyone else they knew, were going to have a karaoke night. Naruto sighed.

“You know we’re all going to have to sing right?” Kiba stated.

“Troublesome.” Shikamaru replied.

“So why don’t we all do a song together?” Sai stated. Sasuke, Kakashi, Yamato and Neji glared. Gaara and Shino remained impassive, and Shikamaru, Kiba, Chouji and Kankuro looked interested.

“You don’t mean _that_ song do ya Sai?” Naruto asked.

“What song?” Sasuke asked. His interest had been peaked.

“Yes Naruto I do mean _that_ song.” Sai stated. Kiba snickered.

“I like this idea. Are you two singing it again?” Kiba asked.

“Yes.” Sai replied.

“This is going to be troublesome.” Shikamaru stated with a broad grin on his face.

“What the hell are they talking about?” Neji asked.

“We weren’t here last time Sakura made us have a karaoke night.” Kakashi stated. Yamato nodded in agreement.

“I too was on a mission.” Shino replied.

“Well my team wasn’t here.” Kankuro added. Kiba grinned evilly.

“You’ll see.” Kiba stated teasingly.

xXxXxXxXxXxXx

The whole gang were at Sakura’s house. Everyone was gathered around, and Sakura, Temari and Ino had just finished wiring up the Karaoke machine.

“So who’s going to go first?” Sakura called. Sai and Naruto grinned and jumped up. Now that Kakashi, Yamato, Sasuke, Shino, Gaara and Kankuro had no idea what was going on, their interest was entirely focused on Sai and Naruto.

“Okay you guys. We know you love this song, so Sai and I decided to sing it again.” Naruto stated. Sakura squealed and grabbed a CD, throwing it in the karaoke machine, and the girls giggled evilly. Kiba, Chouji and Shikamaru were smirking. Temari sat down next to her brothers.

“Do _you_ know what they’re up to?” Kankuro asked his sister. She grinned.

“I was here for the Chunin exams last time they did this.” Temari replied. Sai and Naruto got up to stand in front of everyone. Of course, now the guys were extremely curious. Sasuke watched as Sai took the microphone as a tune started playing.

“They say our love is taboo,  
That what we’re doing is wrong,  
But I don't care what they say,  
'cause my love is so strong” Sai started. Naruto was swaying along to the tune. Sasuke stared at the pair, wide-eyed. Sai carried on.

“They tell us we should be ashamed,  
We’re not husband and wife,  
But I cherish each moment with you,  
I'm so glad you're in my life.” Sai crooned, as he swayed to the music.  Sakura and Ino giggled madly. Sai carried on with the song.  
  
“You're my prison bitch,  
My prison bitch,  
You're not like other men.  
I'm glad we share a prison cell,  
when lights go out at ten!” Kiba and Chouji wolf-whistled.

“I can't escape the way I feel,  
Now that would be a crime.  
As long as I am doing you,  
I don't mind doing time!” Sai sung loudly. Gaara had a wide smirk on his face as the song carried on.

“'cause you're my,  
Prison bitch, my prison bitch,  
And I have no regrets.  
I got you for a candy bar,  
And a pack of cigarettes!” Sai exclaimed, as Naruto wiggled his hips suggestively.

“At first you were resistant,  
But now you are my friend.  
I knew that I would get you,  
In the end!” Sai sang, as he wrapped an arm around Naruto’s waist. Sasuke’s jaw had dropped so low, Kakashi was sure it would touch the floor if he measured it.  
  
Sai carried on singing, whilst holding on to Naruto. “Prison bitch,  
prison bitch,  
I guess that you were sent from up-above  
Yeah!  
Prison bitch,  
prison bitch,  
and now you are my prisoner of love!” Sai sung out, making all the girls in the room laugh loudly.

Naruto pulled away from Sai and started singing into his own microphone.  
“I'm your prison bitch,  
your prison bitch,  
and you're a sex machine!” Naruto sang out. His voice high-pitched like a girl’s.

“Uh huh!” Sai added bluntly. Naruto carried on.

“I only have but one request  
how 'bout some Vaseline?”

“Shut up!” Sai added.

“I'm tired of this prison cell.  
I need to get away!  
They sentenced me to seven years,  
Not seven times a day!” Naruto sang out almost pleadingly. Kankuro and Neji snickered.

“I'm your prison bitch,  
your prison bitch,  
you nympho-maniac!” Naruto exclaimed.

“Come here!” Sai added, and tried to grab Naruto, who danced out of the way.  
“I really hate these knockers that you tattoo'd on my back!” Naruto sang.  
“I thought that I could break away but now I'm losing hope.  
God I'm tired of picking up the soap!” Naruto sang out mournfully.  
  
“Bend over...... prison bitch!!” Sai started singing again. Kiba and Chouji added background noise. “Oo ooh oo!”  
“Prison bitch!” Sai sang again.

“Doo ooh oo!” Kiba and Chouji carried on.  
“Turn out the lights 'cause I can hardly wait!  
Prison bitch!” Sai sang out.

Sakura and Ino joined in. “Doo ooh oo!”  
“Prison bitch!” Sai added.

Ten Ten and Lee joined in. “Doo ooh oo!”  
“When I get out I'm ready to go straight!” Naruto butted in.  
  
“You're my prison bitch,  
my prison bitch,  
I'll never say goodbye!  
You're not like all the others,  
too bad they had to die...” Sai trailed.  
  
Naruto gave a mock surprised face, then started singing again. “On second thought, I think I'll stay, if you want me to-ooo!  
Your prison bitch is never leaving you-oo-oo-oo!” Naruto drew out.  
  
“At first you were my cell mate but now you're my soul mate! Come here baby!! Come here!” Sai growled out, as she made to grab Naruto.

“Oh no not again!” Naruto shrieked girlishly.  
“Now I know why they call you a ‘HARDENED’ criminal!” Naruto added.  
  
“Hang on you're about to find why they call this the pokey!” Sai stated smugly.  
  
The group all started cheering loudly as Naruto and Sai took their bows. Sasuke was in a state of shock, a thin trickle of blood dribbled from his nose. Kakashi waved a hand in front of Sasuke’s face, but the Uchiha was still dazed.

“Sorry guys, but I have to go.” Naruto stated loudly. Sasuke snapped out of his daze then.

“Awe why Naruto-Kun?” Sai asked suggestively. Sasuke saw red.

“Because I have a mission tomorrow from Tsunade Baa-Chan.” Naruto replied. Naruto went to grab his jacket, which was next to Sasuke.

“You alright Teme?” Naruto asked. Sasuke blinked.

“Why would you ask a question like that Dobe?” Sasuke asked.

“’Cause you’re bleeding?” Naruto questioned.

Sasuke tentatively touched a hand to his nose, to find out that Naruto was right.

“Hey Dobe?” Sasuke whispered. Naruto leaned forward curiously. “You and Sai?” Sasuke asked tentatively.

“Yeah?” Naruto questioned back.

“You aren’t... a couple are you?” Sasuke asked. “That whole song was just a show right?” Sasuke added. Naruto grinned at Sasuke foxily.

“Who says it was?” Naruto questioned cheekily.

With that, Naruto stood upright and left. Sasuke was once again dazed, but snapped out of it, when Naruto left the house. He jumped to his feet and ran off.

 ** _“Hey Dobe! That better not be true!”_** The group heard Sasuke yell, once he was outside.

Kakashi and Yamato just looked at each other, and then Sai, before they burst out laughing. The other males in the room looked confused, all except Sai.

“What the hell was Sasuke talking about?” Kiba asked.

“I think Naruto and Sasuke are definitely going to be lucky tonight.” Sai stated, before he went and sat down. The girls just giggled, while the boys still looked confused. The whole group could still hear Sasuke and Naruto bickering from down the street.

**Author's Note:**

> So... thanks for reading, and I hope this made you laugh. (nods)


End file.
